Music is a big part of what is carrying me through this. Today it was Surprise Yourself by Jack Garratt. On my way to work it came on and it released so much tension from my body, let me breath, and then out of nowhere, I was crying. I thought about our trip to Nelson in two weeks. We are just going for a holiday but when we come back, we may come home with a decision in mind. We may come back to tidy up our life here and leave. It hit me when the song came on and I felt the three of us leaving. I felt so relieved and heartbroken all at once.
Love her if you only knew
the times that train has fooled me too
And tears me from a place I know
It helps me to surprise myself
You know you can surprise yourself
So let go and surprise yourself
- Jack Garratt
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